Do guys have as many mood swings as girls? I feel like I've been up and down lately. Just yesterday I wrote about how I was proud of my 5 years at GE and tonight I'm feeling like I haven't done anything with my life.
I went to dinner tonight with some friends, which was great and really fun but it made me realize that I'm in the exact same place I was in a year ago. I know this feeling will pass because it comes and goes sometimes but it sucks when I am feeling it. One of my friends I saw at dinner, I hadn't seen in literally a year and of course the question is, "What's new?!?" and when recapping that... it makes me think... well, nothing is new. I live in the same apartment. I have the same job. I'm still single. I'm still working every day to maintain a healthy lifestyle and resist eating fro yo covered in candy every day.
Yes, I have done a whole bunch of crap within the past year... I went to Brazil. I had some great experiences for work. I dated someone for a few months. I ran a half marathon. Blah, blah, blah.
I just sometimes get caught up in, I don't know, that my life should be at certain points at certain times maybe. That years should be measured with some kind of noticeable change. A new location or a new job or a new relationship. I just feel weird sometimes when you have those awkward small talk catch up conversations. I'm obviously not going to tell her about a vacation I took last August. Or a relationship that both started and ended months ago. I just jump to today. And today is the same as last year.
But you know what, I will use that for motivation to make changes today to make tomorrow better. To find new experiences to challenge myself and grow myself as a person. To keep my life exciting and keep making myself better.
At least I can certainly try.
I didn't feel that motivation really strongly until after dinner though. So it wasn't around to stop me from eating a roll tonight at dinner. But, in my defense it was right out of the oven and warm and that is something that would be a pity to waste.